grieving

Following last night's meeting, I am grieving.
Grieving for my husband who was publicly torn to pieces by the leadership.
Grieving for the leadership that they could do it in such a manner.
Grieving for the church that they have such leaders.
Grieving for the local community that we cannot serve them because we are too focused on our internal problems.
Grieving for God as we tear His body apart with our lovelessness.
Grieving for the possibilities of something exciting and new which will now not happen.
Grieving that this fellowship never seem to learn from the past, and still think the only solution to problems is a change of pastor.
And grieving for myself that all my hopes and dreams have been destroyed.